Thursday, October 9, 2008

Mean Girls

I'm getting tired of the Mean Girls.

Ask any woman and she can tell you a story about Mean Girls. They were the girls who could make you feel small because you wore the wrong shoes or caught the attention of one of "their" boys. They were the ones that always had angry eyebrows and wicked smiles. They came in little nasty clusters of Mean.

A friend told me of a time that a group of Mean Girls threatened to flush her head down the toilet at school so she hid in fear. Another bubbly friend had a story of having Mean Girls in her college dorm set fire to her door posters. Her room mate told her she had been targeted because the other girls thought she was phony and they were all sick of it. Then there's the girl who had to hide in the library for fear of being beaten up because she had made the mistake of becoming a certain boy's girlfriend.

Some Mean Girls have morphed into Mean Moms... Momzillas.

My Twitter buddy, Morningside Mom was sharing about her experiences with Momzillas. The ones that have to make other moms feel less than good about themselves. The ones that critique you indirectly by one-upping every time you bring anything up. Snacks. Bed times. Schools. Vacations. Good Lord, you just don't want to talk to those ladies! Morningside Mom said she just finds reasons to break up with them like time constraints. But what if that mom is on the other end of the couple? For instance, your husband's friend's wife? Uuughhh... I had to deal with that last weekend. You know what? It sucks! I felt like I was on the defensive from the moment we walked in the door. I answered her questions about homeschool and my long trip and having a twenty-year-old at my age very carefully and politely. She softened up a bit when I over-complimented her kids and old mis-matched furniture... (there, now I feel a little better).

Why did she have to rattle my cage so hard???

Did I tell you about the fur flying after BlogHer? Yeah, I know I was on a cloud when I wrote about it on my return. I sort of hinted to one situation. I peeked in on another. But who knew? Okay, so Dooce... I'm a fan. I've found that y'all fall into two camps: Love Her or Hate Her. So, a couple of weeks after we got back, another gal that I was a fan of wrote about her Dooce experience. Apparently, upon being introduced, she was pretty much blown off by Heather. I remembered my Dooce experience and was like, are we talking about the same Heather? Well the blown off fan made it a really big deal eliciting sympathy-for-her-slams-for-Heather comments. I stayed out of it. I didn't really want to pick sides and decided to remain fans of both. But then, for the last couple of months, I've been reading some more of the blown off blogger's stuff. I started seeing a lot of posts that are really just, well... snarky and mean. Her targets have been unschoolers and stay-at-home-dads as well as a poor "friend" that just isn't that into her anymore. She harshly criticizes moms in her neighborhood and in the public eye while she posts pictures of her kids dressed in undies on her blog. Um... Kettle!

So I had to take her off the list.

If you're going to click out of here, I'd prefer it be to give money to Nie Nie or to read about a rockin' mama or to be delighted by a bubbly mom in a pink feather boa.

Why do you think Mean Girls or Momzillas are the way they are? What do you think? Are they jealous? Insecure? Or just born mean? Did their daddies not love them enough or did they learn this behavior from their Momzillas? How did you (or do you) deal with Mean Girls as kids, teens, or co-workers & moms today.

And even though Heather is an Obama fan, Dooce stays on the Blog Roll.

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